Revenge Fantasies and Rain on my Parade.
I've been having a stressful couple of days, workwise. Actually, they shouldn't have been stressful- it's not as crazy round here as it can be and my new über-organised system is working out well. I'm on top of things and it feels fiiine. There's nothing like feeling organised, competent and efficient to put a swing in your step and a smile on your face, is there*?
One hitch: the Evil Boss**. Man, That woman is a beyatch. This is not just my opinion btw, this is someone that everybody dislikes intensely. She's a bully, and when she's stressed or feeling under pressure she makes it her mission to make people miserable. And apparently I'm her new favourite target.
Now, I know what you're thinking, why not just ignore her, and treat her like the petty little nuisance that she is? I just can't seem to do that. She's like a tapeworm that gets under my skin and niggles at me. Freakin' niggler.
So this morning was spent in a huff, stomping around and planning various ways of performing murder. Stabbing in the face, jumping up and down on her stomach, and shoving a live octopus down her throat were all very satisfying. There may also have been some ninjaesque swordplay, but then again isn't there always? I wish I could rise above this and be adult and mature but damn I want to hit her with a shovel.
I think that would be satisfying***.
I offered to make her some tea earlier, but she declined. Obviously she realised that I was planning to gob in it.
*Well, I suppose there's sex, chocolate, fab shoes and heaps of money, but it's a close call.
** See earlier post here . May include bitterness and anger, not for sensitive readers.
*** you know, until the arrest and trial and prison and stuff. Although I'd totally be the prison psycho¹.
¹apparently I no longer suppress my anger.
One hitch: the Evil Boss**. Man, That woman is a beyatch. This is not just my opinion btw, this is someone that everybody dislikes intensely. She's a bully, and when she's stressed or feeling under pressure she makes it her mission to make people miserable. And apparently I'm her new favourite target.
Now, I know what you're thinking, why not just ignore her, and treat her like the petty little nuisance that she is? I just can't seem to do that. She's like a tapeworm that gets under my skin and niggles at me. Freakin' niggler.
So this morning was spent in a huff, stomping around and planning various ways of performing murder. Stabbing in the face, jumping up and down on her stomach, and shoving a live octopus down her throat were all very satisfying. There may also have been some ninjaesque swordplay, but then again isn't there always? I wish I could rise above this and be adult and mature but damn I want to hit her with a shovel.
I think that would be satisfying***.
I offered to make her some tea earlier, but she declined. Obviously she realised that I was planning to gob in it.
*Well, I suppose there's sex, chocolate, fab shoes and heaps of money, but it's a close call.
** See earlier post here . May include bitterness and anger, not for sensitive readers.
*** you know, until the arrest and trial and prison and stuff. Although I'd totally be the prison psycho¹.
¹apparently I no longer suppress my anger.
Labels: bitchiness, Complaining, homicidal tendencies, The Job
posted by Betenoir at 3:15 PM
11 Comments:
Live octopus down the throat!
Live octopus down the throat!
Live octopus down the throat!
I totally have to try that someday...
It's almost like our work situations are interchangeable, except I think you're better looking (it's difficult to be objective).
Offer her a cappuccino. Few people can resist one of those and the gob is so much easier to disguise.
Betenoir, you really shouldn't be calling anyone a "niggler". That word is offensive and outdated. People might begin to call you a behaviourist.
...and: you totally do. It's way fun.
Kyk: perhaps we are actually the same person- a sort of Tyler Durden effect?
Wiggly: since when were you so PC? Fine, "overly detail-oriented with obsessive control tendencies". Happy?
face stabbing is *so* underrated.
She sounds like a heinous bitch if you ask me. Gob away, disguised or not I say!
Be a kind little person and refill her water jug...now that can contain all the gob your little body can produce! one little niggle tho'..tapeworms get in your stomach not under your skin..there is a fly however who lays it's eggs under your skin and the little larvae (maggots) hatch out under your skin...erm I may be a little detail obsessed myself?
you totally are. And also a lazy forgerer! :P
never underestimate the time-saving benefits of forgery. It totally works for me. Especially if you twinkle as you hand over the forgery
..as long as there's some sort of goodie bag in it for me, I don't care! Forge away!
Does she drive a gold Honda Belade? I am sure this is the same person here... I got your back too Bete. I am an expert at pulling out icecream pink dreamnails with rusty pliers. Just give us a holler.
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